A couple who have been married for 17 years have dished out the very simple secrets to their long-lasting romance.
Entrepreneurs Lisa and Tom Bilyeu, from California, revealed the life lessons they learned over their marriage, including having ‘sex often’ and ‘forgive mistakes fast’.
The pair, who are the co-founders of billion dollar health brand Quest Nutrition known for its protein bars, shared a picture of themselves holding a whiteboard with their nine pieces of advice for a successful relationship.
With intimacy taking the lead, the other rules included ‘communicate obsessively’, ‘lift each other up’, ‘be honest’, ‘be a good leader and follower’, ‘hold each other to a high-a** standard’, and ‘make your marriage the highest priority’.
‘There are so many lessons we have learnt in our 17 years of marriage. And one Instagram post just ain’t gonna cover it all so I wanted to choose one to go deep on – number four,’ Lisa said.
‘When you love someone so damn much all you want to do is see them happy. Seeing Tom smile and laugh is literally one of my most favorite things on earth.
‘And so knowing that what you are about to say is going to do the exact opposite? Well my instincts are always to just keep it to myself. But in not saying it, for Tom and I, is as bad as lying.’
She shared a story about one of their date nights when she discovered just how important honesty is in their relationship.
Lisa said she was expecting to get compliments from Tom in the new top she had purchased to surprise him at dinner – but she received ‘nothing’ from him.
So half way through dinner I finally ask him… “Babe what do you think of my new top”. He looks me up and down… then shrugs, “Eh it’s ok” – EH?
‘My heartbroken self went quiet and somewhat offended. And of course he noticed. He proceeded to tell me that he never ever wants to lie to me even if it will make me feel good in the moment.’
‘We plan to be married forever and so it needs to be built on 100 per cent honesty and transparency. And so when I’m 90 years old and a bag of wrinkles, and I wake up with no make up on and he looks at me and tells me I’m beautiful, he needs those moments to carry weight.
‘To not just be BS. He wanted me to know he is telling the truth. Ok the man knows how to phrase things right? But the more I thought about it the more I realized just how right he was.’
From that day on, Lisa said she ‘never ever wants to doubt or question his words’.
‘From the big stuff to the tiny stuff like this! As long as we are always respectful, kind and doing it in service of the other person, we agreed we would always be honest with each other,’ she said.
‘No. Matter. What. And, to be honest, I’m glad he told me because next time if I want to impress him… you better believe I’m not wearing that top.’
Her husband also praised his wife in a gushing post, alongside their nine rules, on Instagram, saying: ‘My marriage to Lisa is my highest priority.
‘Why? Because nothing has given me more joy, ever. All the money in the world can’t come close to having someone who lifts you up and pushes you to be better. My wife is my all-time favorite human,’ he said.
‘She is absolutely ride or die. And together, we have come up with a lot of rules, lessons, tips, and tricks for making your marriage the best thing in your life.’
The couple’s post has since gone viral, with thousands of people praising the pair for giving them hope for their own relationship.